Self-esteem

Decisions, Cross Roads, Challenges and Me

askvilleEvery now and then I find myself at a crossroad in life.  A time and place where you know you need to choose a direction, make a decision and that the choice you make will affect the rest of your life. 

I’ve sat at this crossroad wondering how I got there, trying to look at it objectively and thinking that once I saw the decisions I needed to make in the clear light of day, there was no debating, no wondering, no hesitation at all, the choices are simple.

You see, when I moved away from my ex husband my self-confidence was gone, my self-esteem was non-existent, and my self-worth was hiding in a dark corner somewhere.  The verbal and emotional abuse had taken its toll and it has taken a long time to get back to…me.

So, after going through a very rough holiday season where I spent a lot of time alone, grieving and generally feeling sorry for myself, I suddenly realized that I was choosing to feel alone, choosing to grieve, choosing to feel sorry for myself.  I had to stop and think about that awhile.  What else have I been choosing either by doing nothing, trying to ignore things, or just not dealing with things I knew I needed to own up too?

The answers have astounded.  How did I find them?  By truly looking at where I was and thinking about how I want to be remembered when I’m gone.  If I were to die 3 years from now, what would the people in my life say about me?  I didn’t like the answers my mind came up with.  I have a lot of work to do.  There’s nothing like visualization to get your goals clearly back in focus. 

One thing I’ve learned is that it takes far more energy to sit down and put up with things, force yourself to accept things, and look the other way, than it does to stand up, take responsibility, own up to your mistakes and take charge of your life. 

When you find yourself feeling bored, unhappy, depressed, or just down, ask yourself why?  Are you choosing to feel that way?  Or are there things you are allowing to go on in your life that are not in sync with who you are and what you believe as a person?  Either way you have choices, you have options and possibilities.  Stand up and take action!  It will change your perspective and your life.

Cherry Coley (c)

Slightly Irritated with Spam

Brand new Mayan calendar and the spammers are driving me nuts!  Honestly, do you really have nothing else to do other than torment bloggers by filling up their comments sections?  Perhaps a course in time management might help you to realize how much of yours and every one else’s time you are wasting?

Perhaps your self esteem is so low that you are doing this for attention.  There are other more useful ways to get attention.  Why don’t you spend the time doing something nice for someone else instead?

It’s Christmas time, are you saying you (as a spammer) honestly have nothing else that you would rather be doing?  How sad for you.  I feel sorry for you and your lack of friends, self esteem and apparent lack of interests.  Maybe you could spend some time in a library and find something more interesting to do.

Oh well, Merry Christmas to you anyway.  I do hope you will find joy in spending time with others and find ways to enjoy, and grow the relationships with the people in your life.  Good luck to you. 

Cherry Coley (c)

The Choice is Yours!

Today I am thankful for choices.  I love the fact that we have so many choices each day, starting with our attitude.  We can choose to be happy, choose how we approach the day ahead and choose the direction our day will go. 

 Even if you have a day when everything seems to fall apart, you keep making mistakes, or other people get on your nerves, you still have the ability to choose how you will respond.

 Choices are among the most important things we have available to us.  Our choices will lead to decisions that over time will show others who we are and what we stand for.

 Today celebrate your ability to make choices.  There is always hope when there are choices to be made and there are always choices to be made.  Today choose to have a cheery attitude, choose to share your time with others, choose to make a difference, choose.

 Cherry Coley ©