Are You Listening To Me?

There is nothing more important in any relationship than feeling like the other person listens to you.

I am sad to say that there have been moments in my life when I haven’t listened as well as I should have.  I have on occasion found myself hurrying someone along so that they would get to the point and I could go on my way many times in the past, especially with the storytelling personality of some people.

My dad could tell wonderful stories.  When I was a child I used to love to sit and listen to him for hours.  My youngest daughter has inherited this gift as well.  Oh, I know you’re thinking I am a story-teller as well.  You are right; I used to sit in groups of kids at different schools telling all sorts of stories each day.  Somehow my storytelling has found its way to the written form more these days. 

My youngest daughter has an imagination beyond compare, the tales she can weave span entire generations and involve so many characters that about half way through you’re wondering how you got from point “A” to point “P”.  She is truly amazing!  Sometimes, when life is hectic, we tend to try to hurry her along so she will find the point, make it, and we can change the subject.  She is hard to get to hurry or change “channels” and often will stick to the rambling until she’s done, you’re frustrated, she’s mad, and the point got thrown out the window. 

 Yet, that is not active listening.  Active listening would involve listening to the story, asking questions if needed, but not to interrupt, putting your own feelings and emotions aside, and allowing yourself to be in the moment and enjoying the conversation.  That also includes turning off the radio, putting down the cell phones and focusing on the person speaking.  The effect is amazing.  The attitude of the speaker improves because they are being heard.  The person listening is learning about the speaker by listening, eye contact and watching expressions, both people gain by the encounter and the relationship is strengthened. 

 Listening and communication have always been the most important things in relationships, but especially now in this high pressured, busy, sometimes almost frantic pace we all keep to make sure everything is done each day, it seems more important than ever to find that person that is a true friend, an oasis in the midst of chaos, that we can turn too and have them just….listen. 

 Cherry Coley ©

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About www.spilledcookies.com

Life is a gift, not to be wasted or taken for granted. I believe life is a journey, that we are put here for a purpose that each of us has to discover within ourselves. Each day we are given is a new opportunity to seize the moments, the experiences that make up our individual journey. I have seen my share of storms along the way, but have learned that with faith and good friends, there is nothing that you can’t face, learn from, and come out growing stronger from the experience. I have many interests, hobbies and passions. Writing, art, and expanding my knowledge about why people believe what they do, including studying different religions and cultures, becoming a Life Coach, practicing Reiki, and spending time with my girls, are some of my passions. Interests include: studying history, science, physics, walking/running, learning yoga, Pilates, trying new recipes, finding new and interesting places to visit, spending time with friends, learning new ways of doing things, guitar, piano, writing songs, photography, and painting and so much more than I could name here. I enjoy meeting new people, trading stories, ideas and sharing experiences. I love going to plays and concerts, and encouraging others to be their best while finding myself along the way. Cherry Coley (c)
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7 Responses to Are You Listening To Me?

  1. sharonstjoan says:

    How very true and profoundly important too!

  2. random8042 says:

    That last sentence sounded like somthing Humphrey Appleby would say. Love it.

  3. Thank you! Nice Compliment!

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